I recently had a date, let’s not get too excited over it.  It’s been a few months since I have been asked out on a date that I actually accepted.  I was looking forward to it.

The date was only two hours, disappointing.  I had high hopes of a connection with him but the guy didn’t give it a chance.  I felt like he wanted to go home get loaded and get off on his own, it can be easier I get it.  I clearly wasn’t going to put out and he figured that out sooner than later.  He cut the evening short, I was just getting started.  I actually arrived home in time to watch a rerun of Saturday Night Live.

I like being romanced, I do.  Maybe since that’s how it was when I was a teen, traditional dating was still around. That included dinner and a movie during the evening, a full evening with someone new.  No one was worried about wasting their time or money, they looked forward to it.  In the summer I remember miniature golf was the top dating activity and there was always a line.  Dating was fun, the guy always made you feel like you were the only one on this earth.

Today during my workout at the gym it really hit me.  I am not only disappointed in the date last night but it brought up memories of a guy I use to date.  I am cursed by this guy I had a relationship with years ago.  Yep cursed.  I usually don’t like that word, but it fits.  Let’s just call him “the ex” for the sake of keeping things straight. He made me feel special, he treated me kindly, we had easy conversation without feeling uncomfortable, we even laughed.  He knows how to date, he knows women.  He was the ultimate guy for me at one time.  We had a connection right away.  After lunch, yes due to our schedules we met for lunch but it was the most romantic lunch I’ve ever had.  We sat on the bench holding hands after lunch just being together like we had met before and we were just picking up from another life that we lived together.  And the kiss, oh the kiss….smack dab on my memory and in my veins.  To this day it has never left me.  I’ll never forget our first kiss in the mall parking lot. His dark brown eyes looking into my blue eyes, his large full lips touching mine for a spark that would last forever in my heart. I asked him, “Are you afraid?” Maybe I was the one afraid of what I was feeling.  He replied “No.” Sealing it with another kiss.

He texted me a few hours later and asked me out for a second date on Sunday, I said yes of course with a kiss like that are you kidding me?  He pursued me, he had confidence and I have to say confidence in a man is HUGE!  Again, he texted me on Tuesday and asked me on a date for Sunday.  That’s a turn-on, a man who likes you enough to think about you in advance and make plans.  The topper of all of this…the topper….he texted the night before CONFIRMING our date for the next day! Ok, so he is pretty much going to get laid at this point, especially by the 3rd date ;).  So, was it our connection or was it the way he pursued me? Or both? I was highly attracted to him but if he didn’t give a hoot about when he saw me that attraction would have faded.  Who wants to be treated as a second thought or gesture when you’re looking for a person to put you first in a relationship.  It has to start from the beginning because if it doesn’t, it never will.

So at the gym the tears begin as I’m doing my inner thigh machine, yea perfect timing.  I suck the tears back into my head and realize what I had with “the ex” was a once in a lifetime connection.  I may find something again with someone but it definitely wasn’t last night.

I will just keep writing my romance stories knowing one day I’ll star as the lead in my own romance once again.




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